…about the new siteI’ve only got minutes to write this; hope it makes sense!
Update for October 01, 2012
The first beta test went very well. We found out that the site works almost perfectly with the newer browsers. Unfortunately, most of my fans have older browsers.
We’ll ask more people to participate in our next beta test. If you’re interested please leave a comment here.
Also, please like my sponsor’s Facebook page. If not for the good folks at Oddhobby “Fookleyur” wouldn’t exist!
At the time of this writing there is a “squater” (imposter) on facebook.com/weirdstore so please use my link (above) to get there.
Update for August 21, 2012
They spent the last month working on the site!
I’m in Chicago and I’ve seen the site in action.
The “front end” is done and it is awesome!
We just need you to beta test it. I’ll let you know when and where.
The back end still needs work, but I’m just amazed at what these guys are doing for me!
March 16, 2012
The good news is the site is still “greenlit,” meaning it will be completed. The bad news is we won’t get our programmer back for at least 2 more months. As always, a special thanks to John Slaughter for acting as art director and #1 fan!
The location of the new site will still be at Fookleyur.com — if you go there now you’ll see one or two links to some of my old work, and a link to this blog, and a picture of a government syphilis ray stolen from Alex Jone’s sock drawer.
My new site will have absurdist short stories and poems, as well as sci-fi stories. Displayed next to my stories and poems (but not necessarily illustrating them) will be surrealist art created by some of the top artists in the world. No, I’m not exaggerating. Think of Douglas Adams meets Heavy Metal Magazine!
Of course, when people ask me, “Are you as good of a writer as Douglas Adams?” I say, “Hell yeah! That motherfucker’s dead!”
Just kidding, I’m a huge Douglas Adams fan–if you like my work you’ll absolutely love his. I have all his books and his game, and they’re all autographed. The last time I saw him was at E3 or some other game event, and he signed a copy of Titanic for me.
That reminds me, on a scale of 1 to 10 Douglas Adams wrote at an absurdity level of about 7. I normally write at potato or higher, sometimes even up to eleven. That means you’ll need to stop taking LSD if and when you read my work otherwise you may cause permanent damage to your cZc (cranial Zombie cabbage).
Protect The Stupid
Absurdist comics are very hard to right, but I think I’ve got it write. However, we haven’t found a cartoonist yet. If you’re interested in collaborating please contact John Slaughter or me.
From my Usenet days, I know that most of my fans are “lurkers” so I understand why in spite of having a nice sized audience, no one is leaving any comments. It could also be the case that many of you prefer a more interactive scenario, like Facebook!
Well, good news everyone! I’m on Facebook! There’s only one Fookleyur on Facebook, so look me up! In the mean time, I remind you that it’s ok to post comments here on the blog. They don’t have to be clever or strange, you can just say hello. Although, that would be really lame and would bring shame upon your entire family. And don’t be intimidated by the fact that “back in the day” I was the king of all trolls and the godfather of the Usenet flame wars; I promise I’ll be nice.
I have a great deal of content for the blog, but we ran out of room at Flickr! There’s a 200 image limit and we hit it. If you want to donate a pro Flickr account that would be fine, otherwise we need to save our storage space for the new site. That means I have to write twice as much content and you have to read instead of looking at pictures (and probably masturbating even when the pictures aren’t sexual in nature).
Our Exquisite Corpse (“The Foreskin” ) didn’t really take off like I hoped it would. I’ll try to get back to it and at least give it a better head start. Hah! No pun intended.
Sadly, I haven’t been able to get on the internet to my blog, DeviantArt, and Facebook etc. as much as I’d like to. Suffice it to say, I have health issues, internet issues and computer issues. I’m pretty sure I’ve done something to piss off God, so I’ve been sacrificing virgins to try to turn things around. Nothing so far, but I heard that 72 is the magic number. We’ll see.
But don’t worry, I hope to be redeemed soon; it’ll just take some time before I can catch up to all my emails and get back to writing everyday.
But I do answer all my emails, so keep ’em coming!
PS John will make my FaceBook page perdy after 25 of y’all like it… so Like iT!